Saturday, February 10, 2007

Anna Nicole Smith: America's Princess Di

I was watching Fox News when word first came of former Playboy Playmate of the Year Anna Nicole Smith's shocking death and I immediately felt as I did on that day in 1997 when news first broke of Princess Diana's death, which is so touchingly re-created in the film The Queen. Soon all of the cable news channels were covering this tragic event with nonstop, wall-to-wall coverage. As Americans mourned and grieved in front of our televisions, we were brought together once more as a people, our divisions over the War in Iraq, terrorism and the Bush Administration momentarily forgotten. Once seemingly important stories like the Scooter Libby trial, Nancy Pelosi's plane and the astronaut assassin were put on the back burner as Fox, CNN and MSNBC reported on every last unconfirmed detail of the events transpiring in Hollywood, Florida, and reporters struggled to articulate our grief. In the media frenzy that ensued they interviewed witnesses at the hospital where she was brought, talked to hotel guests and even gave us a tour of the room where her autopsy was performed. They speculated endlessly about the paternity of her baby and the mysterious cause of her untimely death, which will no doubt be investigated for years to come and be the subject of numerous conspiracy theories as Princess Di's death has been.

Anna Nicole Smith was a wonderful and a warm human being, although her own life was often sadly touched by tragedy. She touched the lives of so many others in the United States and throughout the world with joy and with comfort. She was the American People's Princess and that is how she will stay, how she will remain in our hearts and our memories for ever.

Like Princess Diana she came from humble beginnings. She did not always comfortably wear her crown as a member of America's celebrity royalty. The paparazzi hounded her endlessly. But despite all of her fame and wealth she was always regarded as one of the people.

She made a difference in the lives of ordinary people, not just by her grace and beauty. Her marriage to billionaire J. Howard Marshall showed that the American Dream is alive and well and accessible to anyone with a little pluck and hard work. Her name will forever live on in the halls of justice for her victory in the landmark Supreme Court case Marshall v. Marshall, which struck a blow for the rights of millions of young widows of elderly billionaire husbands.

Many prominent Americans have offered their own words of tribute to Anna Nicole Smith. Publisher Hugh Hefner, who chose her to appear on the cover of Playboy after she submitted her photos to a contest, issued a statement calling her a "dear friend." CNN's Larry King said, "She was a special person, she was an unusual person. She was genuine, she was funny, she had some class." PETA celebrated her hatred of cruelty to animals and her love for her dog. "Animals have lost a true hero and PETA has lost a good friend," they said.

Unfortunately, from the White House we have heard only silence. President Bush has not even made a statement about the tragic death of his fellow Texan. He seems to be out of touch with the nation's grief. I have always been a supporter of the President but his tin-eared response to this tragedy is making me wonder if he is living in a bubble. He has not even called for the simple gesture of lowering American flags to half-staff. Perhaps his aides are meeting at Camp David this weekend and debating how they will respond. At this point Americans will settle for nothing less than a state funeral for Smith. I hope that the White House will heed their call. Even Queen Elizabeth realized that she would have to move with the times and listen to the people as difficult as it might have been for her. I hope that President Bush will show he is at least as in touch with reality as an old queen.

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Anonymous said...

Animals of all sorts have lost a friend, starting with Fox.

Anonymous said...

This is a joke, right?

Anonymous said...

This is very similar to when Steve Irwin died. In one way it was tragic and depressing, because it is always a shock to the system when someone we know, albeit only through our tv sets, and someone relatively young, dies. Yet in both deaths, we could see it coming a mile away and really were not surprised at all. But for me, the most shocking part is the fact that Anna Nicole Smith died, yet Courtney Love is still alive. Unbelievable!

OutOfContext said...

This is very similar to when Steve Irwin died. There's not a stingray in the world that could have reached her heart. I mean that with all due respect, of course.
And, Swift, your not so oblique final line reference to Sir Elton John and his Candle In The Wind tribute to Di was kind of gratuitous.

Anonymous said...

If Anna Nicole Smith is America's Princess Di then things are worse for Americans than I thought. She was a big boobed, big assed, loud mouthed, drunk with a drug problem and a love of money that revealed an ugly side to her showbiz smile. The only thing she shared with Di was the terrible lack of self worth.

If America mourns her passing for more than a day or two I'll be stunned. She was NOT a national treasure (as Di is often referred to) she was however somewhat of a national joke, and the only reason why people aren't laughing at her today is because her dead body has barely gone cold.

I'm sad she died, but she was never, not ever, America's Princess Di.

Dick Durata said...

Well simon, you don't know what it's like to live without your own Princess Di, and life here in America has suffered, in that J. Howard Marshall was not royalty, but just another crappy billionaire like that nerd Bill Gates but not so rich. Sure Grace Kelly married royalty, and she was kind of our Princess Di until she died, but that was a long time ago, and we really couldn't comprehend how important having a Princess Di is until there was the real Princess Di.
But what I really wanted to say in this time of emotion is that I think our President would have made a fitting tribute to Anna Nicole Smith, if Dick Cheney had allowed him to.
What I'm beginning to suspect is that Mr. Cheney is holding President Bush prisoner, either by using powerful drugs, or by putting a double in his place while our President languishes in some hellhole of a prison, God knows where.
Do you think this is possible Mr. Swift? Or am I just overcome with grief?

Anonymous said...

Two words: "Good Riddance".

Princess Di? You've got to be kidding me. This thing was as low on the trash pole as you can get. Amazed it took more that 5 seconds on the news much less days!

Anonymous said...

Blessed Lord!

I've only just now been able to step away from my mourning chamber and get on the computer to share my grief. My princess is gone... my princes.. my blessed princess...

Please pass the bong.

jurassicpork said...

In the post to which Jon had linked, I alluded to the fact that Anna Nicole, sadly, was someone to whom we all aspired to become: a Wal-Mart refugee and trailer park trash trying to make a quick buck, earned or otherwise. In her, we saw a magnified, idealized and glamorized version of ourselves, her pedestrian counterparts.

Jon, I'll be blogrolling you as soon as I leave here.

Carol said...

You have GOT to be joking! While I think it is sad that one so young has died under whatever conditions, and agree that her life had it's tragedies but...Princess of the People? Jon I know you are joking!

Anonymous said...

I recently read the results of a poll which asked children what they most wanted. I can only recall that "to be famous" was number one; with "to be rich" in second place.

Kindness, intelligence and social contribution did not even make the top ten.

Puh-leeze people, this woman is a perfect representation of today's American aristocracy. Own it.

Anonymous said...

I never thought of Smith as being our Princess Di. More like Princess DD.

Anonymous said...

no way can you be serious
she desevered to do lil methdone hag.

Anonymous said...


A Bowl Of Stupid said...

Ah yes, this week the world mourns the loss of a visionary.

Truly, if this tragedy can happen to someone as sweet and innocent as Anna Nicole, it can happen to anyone.

Anonymous said...

You know, it's true: widows usually do die soon after their husbands.

Anonymous said...

Great Linkbait Jon lmao.kudos to you.
health and Prosperity,

Deborah Newell said...

I, for one, am comforted that ANS is finally at peace, strutting through the clouds in her white Guess jeans, inspiring the Almighty to say Dear Me, I do make a fine human when I set My mind to it, while simultaneously tapping into his Treo: Note to Self--for My sake, see if Christ knows what the hell it is she's mumbling and giggling about.

Anonymous said...

What will we do without a substance abusing, trashy acting, slutty looking woman like ANS to follow? Well, at least we have Brittany Spears and Paris Hilton.

Nick Kasoff
The Thug Report

Anonymous said...

Anna Nicole defined Mother America. Young, old, black, white, liberal or crazed wingnut...we all wanted to nestle in her ample bosom. And now she's gone. Who's left?

Anonymous said...

"I, for one, am comforted that ANS is finally at peace," litbrit

I'm not so sure about this. I think she might have been ready to suckle this proud nation to victory. America may have lost it's goddess of fertility, pagen and addicted though she was. Now we must turn to other sources of comfort and well-being. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

The Tour Marm said...

I'm new to your blog so I don't know if your tongue was firmly in you cheek; I certainly hope it was.

As for me, I had no use for either one of them. The major exception is that we know who fathered Diana's children and Diana did do some charitable work.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure what the autopsy will reveal, in terms of the physical cause of death. However, as a psychologist, I can say that this was the ultimate cause:

The Hole in the Soul
(of Anna Nicole)
words and music by Dr BLT (c)2007

Anonymous said...

This is a highly amusing post and comments. The comparison of Anna Nicole Smith to Princess Diana is simply hilarious. It's like comparing our current president with Lincoln - or Jefferson! Simply hilarious. Thanks for the great laugh.

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